Are you sexually tongue tied?  Can you really open up to your partner and tell them just what you want? Read on if you would like to learn how to open up the lines of communication for talking about sex.

Now  for most couples in this day and age, they are not entirely happy with their sex lives.  What is it that they are looking for?  If you ask yourself this question I am sure that you could come up with an answer.  If not a whole answer at least the start of something that you are feeling.  So what they are seeking could be more passionate sex, more interesting sex or just plain more of everything? 

In the end it comes down to thinking that something seems to be missing.  Now do not get me wrong this does not mean that your whole sexual relationship is bad.  This just means that the lines of communication in your relationship regarding sex is not where it should be to achieve a 100 % open an honest relationship.  And sharing with your partner what you want is very important for the both of you.

Lets go through a few steps to achieving the sexual relations that we really want.

The first thing that we need to do is to "define what is wrong or what is the issue."  Now for most couple this is not an easy task to accomplish.  And for the most part can not seem to do easily as a couple or as individuals.  They are unable to sit down as a couple and have calm, positive discussion about how they can make there sex lives better.  This is mostly because neither one has anything to bring to the discussion together.  However there are some that can identify what the problems are but just do not know how they would approach a conversation to there partner about it. 

Everyone is different and all couples are different and for the most part tend try and avoid the "sex talk", especially when its needed.  Its easier to grumble and say hurtful things like " I am unhappy with our sex life"  then try and say something like " I would like to make love twice a week instead of once a month."  Now reading these two statements the route of the problem is the same but the presentation is totally different.  Couples do have a hard time identifying there problems when it comes to sex and asking for change along with it seems like for some trying to climb a huge mountain covered in ice. 

When we talk about sex we are talking about our truest selves.  We as human being try to isolate the "erotic bedroom activity" into the one aspect of our lives that we describe as "our sex life"  But we really can not contain. can we.  Think about that for a minute.  If we as couples start discussing something as important to our personal identities and our relationship as sex  this tends to make everyone involved intensely vulnerable.  This is the one place where we can all get hurt very badly.  And adding to that how do we as individuals react or respond to the fear of being hurt?  It is human nature for us to try and protect ourselves from that while situation.  And unfortunately in m most cases this means that it prevents people from opening up in there relationships. 

To make things worse most couples are not fluent in the language of sex when they do discuss it.   Which makes them more embarrassed to even begin to take about their sex life and the techniques that they use in their relationship.